Public Airwaves Beware.

Friday I went live on the air for a friend's radio show. That's right folks, yours truly was broadcast live on the airwaves via the Clemson radio station that no one listens too. And I know what you're thinking...what a crackhead?? Who in their right mind would give this girl a microphone and allow her to speak LIVE.

I remember one of my first "live" speaking experiences. No, it wasn't on the airwaves, but it was televised via our local tv station as I spoke in front of the church. I don't remember much from that day, except for two highlights.

1. I either tripped up or down the stage over a microphone cord. This should come as no surprise, as I am the epitome of grace. I'm sure that moment made mom and dad real proud.

2. I made many really awkward statements that are not socially acceptable to make to a congregation full of old southern baptists. ( I would recap but I'd rather not relive it...Jamie Williams could probably share stories though.)

But this isn't actually about my old church speakin' days...it's about my most recent moment of fame. I was asked to discuss the medical field and health care, since apparently he though I would be an insightful biology student with ER experience.

I'm pretty sure it was an epic fail.

Let me also preface by saying that one of the other gentleman I was on air with is a very conservative Christian. While I too am a believer, life in the ER has made me talk about awkward subjects slightly more freely than others.

So here I am on the air. I've got these rockin' headphones with a very official looking microphone and we start discussing. Much of this is a blur, but let me give you a taste of the awkward stories I shared.

1. There is a lack of sex education and health education. Direct quotes, "Parents these days are idiots. Hmm...my eight year old has a fever of 99.0. I think I should refrain from giving them tylenol and rush them to the emergency room, where a doctor will then prescribe him children's motrin. Give me a break parents...gain some common sense!" This was followed by a statement by the guy doing the radio show "The opinions and beliefs do not express the views of this radio show."

2. Yet again, I was talking about health education as a fail. "When I was a sophomore in highschool they made us take health class. The only thing I remember learning was that I was going to hit puberty and have a period and get bigger boobs. Soo...is that what has been happening all these years?" The other people on the show were both guys...they looked at me a little disgusted. Clearly I need to gain a filter.

3. Yet another slightly offensive comment directed at people that are uneducated about healthcare...which I do in fact feel bad about. (I believe school and government are a fail for not helping people learn a little more about their own bodies.) "We have 18-year old idiots waltz in on their cell phones claiming they are having heart attacks. Really?? Have you ever heard of heart-burn and indigestion. Morons." This was yet again followed by a disclaimer.

Apparently all of my statements elicit disclaimers. I'm pretty sure the guy that asked me on will not be inviting me again for another rendevous.